home is where the heart is

another two days tiga kali mandi nak balik rumah for chinese new year break. can't wait can't wait can't waittttttt !

party like a rockstar

happy 19th birthday amirah arina ! it was super fun celebrating it. kesian dia ni. punya lah surprise, habis baju favourite dia kena cake. May God bless you buddy !

orange and watermelon

for some reason, i'm really craving for some fresh orange juice but unfortunately takde dekat puncak alam ni. i'm not talking bout those orange juices that you get in bottles. i want the ones you get at those food stalls or even the ones at kedai mamak. nak ! nak nak nak nak naaaaaak ! makcik pekerja cafe raffle, nak orange juice :( kalau takde tembikai pun boleh. dekat sini semua pun jual teh ais, bandung, air limau. nak orangeeee pleaseeee laaaaaa i'm begging youuuuuuuuuuu

what the hell

i lovelovelove avril's new song "what the hell"


have you ever suddenly felt sad and you don't know why?
then you funnily become really hungry but you don't want any food you see, and you can't figure out what food you want, and you don't think it even exists. but then you realize that what you want is to see the person you're missing.

i do. actually this is what i'm feeling right now.
sad & hungry

but i don't exactly know who i'm missing. i just feel kinda empty. so i talked to Ilham & Ika bout it. they said sometimes people feel this. sometimes we feel empty inside but don't know whats wrong. and to be frank, i don't like it. it kinda y'know, hurts.

cry me out

When someone walks out of your life, let them. There’s no use in wasting your time on people that leave you. What you make of yourself and your future is no longer tied to them. Yeah, you may miss them. But remember that you weren’t the one that gave up.

time is standing still

penatnyaaaaa lah . assignments . tutorials . another 2 months nak finals dah . takpe struggle sikit je lagi. bulan 3 nanti the suffering will end and i'll be on a six-month break before degree.

penat nyaaa


note to self : hang in there. u'll be fine :)

alive and kicking

I'm happy to say that I'm in much higher spirits. i hate sounding all gloomy and sad writing my posts but sometimes I just need to vent - as we all do, I suppose. In any case, I think that the sadness & emptiness is far behind me now. And here are a few things that helped clear my head and warm my soul:

• i listen to inspiring songs. who says taylor swift is the only person that can write meaningful lyrics ? so can the all-american rejects, sum 41 & bon jovi. great lyrics by my all-time fave musicians. to be the cherry on top of the icecream, i bought myself a new ipod nano, replacing my old broken one.

• my family and friends. thanks for the on-going support. thankyou izzat afiq for never getting bored of listening me say 'his' name. and what warmed the cockles of my heart was when daddy said
  
  " takpe mira. nanti daddy mesti cakap thanks dekat dia sebab tinggalkan mira. sebab dia lepaskan mira dekat orang yang lebih bagus drpd dia "
  
  this was a phone call so tak berapa nak ingat sgt the exact words but there it is. he's the world's greatest dad :')

• went shopping. this is my way of therapy. i feel overjoyed when i buy something new

• this encouraging book that i recently bought and read. yeah i know, it's too cliche to read books abt breakups. but this one is in fact humorous and inspiring. not sad at all. and come on, i think i need this. one whole year and still not over him ? COME ONNN
  

• Tumblr. the feeling i get when reading inspirational quotes and funny pictures. it cheers me up.
  
  

• I don't want to miss out on all the fun in life. i'll start to walk ahead and never look back. i'm kind of pinky swearing my own two pinkies :D
  

everything's cool

maybe i'll even laugh about it someday. but not today.

" there's a reason why people from your past don't make it to your future "

i'm still as vulnerable as i was a year ago
it's not that i hate you. i never could
it's just that i can't be friends anymore.
it's hard for me
unlike how easy it is for you.
you've already earned yourself a new girl
kudos to you.

so i'm gonna pretend that what happened today never happened.
i'm gonna smile and lift my head up, just like what i was doing yesterday.

like what barney stinson always says :
"whenever i feel sad, i stop being sad and be awesome instead" :D




p/s : i wish you the best, i guess .

dear afifi aizira,

you've probably arrived in Syria by now and i'm very deeply sorry that we didn't meet up before you left. you sent me this warm-long-tear-jerking text message this morning around 3 but i was already dead asleep and was really upset that i didn't wake up at that instance. you see, i didn't know that you're flight was on the 8th, i thought it was on the 10th. and i was stuck studying fr exams i had today. Honestly if i knew, i would've called you last night and we could have talked for hours, screw my exams. i'm really upset with myself for not being able to meet you before you left. i truly am. i could literally kick myself in the butt. and yeah, i replied your text waaaay too late, you must've already been on your way by then. well anyways, i just want you to know that you've been such an AMAZING friend. And also the longest i've known. we've known each other for like 9 years? i know right, that long ! and despite the fact that i've moved away from shah alam, it just seems like we never lose contact and still keep up to date. i love you for that :) remember the good old days when you would come to my house in shah alam after school and we would make up our own recipes and cook and swim out at the swimming pool and have sleepovers. i miss those days. we were so close. you, me, farah, nabila and nik. we were like peanut butter and jelly ; stuck on each other. oh and there's this time that i felt like i could give the world to you, and farah. the time when i felt all empty and soul-less. when i broke up. you guys made me feel ever so lucky that i was ever blessed to meet you guys. eventhough you guys were like miles away, i really felt like i was leaning on your shoulders. so dear fifi, i just want you to take good care of yourself there and come back with an honorable degree script. you're such a sweet but LOUD little lady. hope you meet beautiful and amazing new people there though also please remember us here. you'll always be safe in our hearts. so long buddy. you will be dearly missed. especially be me :')

i ♥ you like a fat kid loves cake

skinny mini blondie booby girly girls .

nineteen this year ?
i need a time machine. i don't wanna grow OLD ! sooner or later i'll be paying all sorts of bills and have wrinkles. screw that, i'm more afraid of what the future holds. what i'm gonna become, who will i marry, will he be handsome *grins* and most importantly, will i be happy ? the future may now seem a bit scary. but it could be magical. miracles happen. so i should just embrace today and count my blessings

everything you want

this unexplainable feeling i'm feeling :

" He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
And you don't know why "
..........................................................................................................................


tomorrow there's gonna be a biology & maths test. ignoring everything besides the test, my room's become a mess

susah betul bila ipod dah tinggal nyawa nyawa ikan ni -____- ipod ni mmg suka buat hal memang eeee ! tadi dah tak tahan lepastu baling atas lantai. sekarang dia jadi mcm ni

dah berjam dah dia mcm ni. so yeah maybe you need to take a break after being played for like almost 24/7 by your dear owner. since form 3 ! so if you feel like you've had enough, then okay lah. i'll keep you safe in your box and find a replacement. thankyou for playing music in times i needed you most. i ♥ you :)

kinetics

WHAAAAAT THEEEEEE *******someone kill me pleaseeeee ! i'm begging for mercy here doing this friggin chemistry lab report on kinetics. okay i am not ashamed to admit that i am so called buta IT. Plot graph pakai computer pun tak reti *screams* then bila dah pandai, macam mana pulak nak cari the friggin gradient pakai ni ya Allah susah nyaaaa kenapa takde siapa nak ajar. malas nak fikir, i logged into Tumblr then started to reblog reblog reblog ! then saje je nak tgk ada class apa on monday, sekali nampak tutorial maths. Oh just stab me with a knife will ya ? ada quiz okayyyy i forgot that my tutor kata nak buat quiz lepas cuti oh my god noooo ! this whole mid-sem break pula pergi baca chemistry & biology. Oh great -____-

wonderwall

I wonder if boys think of us when they can't sleep at night, worry about seeing a girl they like, worry about their look, get nervous when they are talking to us, write a girl's name all over the page...Or are these all things that girls just do?

so long goodbye

i've been through 01/01/01, 02/02/02, 03/03/03, 04/04/04, 05/05/05, 06/06/06, 07/07/07, 08/08/08, 09/09/09, & 10/10/10

Goodbye 2010. Thanks for the memories :)